Monday, July 26, 2010

Mandai Crematorium

And Ah Mah's funeral ended at Mandai Crematorium Hall 3.
The cold aircon did not help.
It just made things worst.
Prior, the loud clanging of cymbals and drums did not help.
It just made the heart beat faster.
Brought the time faster to Mandai.
Brought the heartache closer to heart.
Memories of Ah Mah bringing us up keep appearing.
Looking at, looking at XL, my heart nearly stopped.
The days when Ah Mah had to tend to us were over.
The days when we shout Ah Mah and she is around are gone.
What's left are mere memories.
All good memories.
Dear said Ah Mah died on a peaceful passing at 91.
She was blessed with her children, grandchildren and greatgrandchildren,
and we counted 79 relations on the orbituary.
I should not cry, but tears know no limit.
The heart and the mind know no end.
Past few days, I busied myself.
Took down all the phone numbers of all relatives.
Momentarily, tears stopped.
Spotted a moth yesterday towards the last prayer session before we were to burn the house.
XL said he saw it before that.
I think 小姑and her sons saw it too.
After the burning, I rushed back, could not find it anymore.
Every quiet moment hurts.
And it still hurt ...


  1. my condolences.. memories of my grandpa's last few moments came to my mind all of a sudden this afternoon when i went to TTSH for a medical appointment..

    i can relate a little to how you are feeling.. it takes some time. hug hug!


  2. Hey Girl, take care.
    Understand the pain that happened to me when my grandma passed away too.